feels like i can't achieve anything i desired

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i am drowned in overthinking . i am commerce+applied maths and i literally spend 2 years building my profile to study abroad in a good uni i took SAT( tho the marks weren't good but yeah it is not required much in asian and european unis) and 2 AP where i performed very good side by side i joined online clubs and built profile because i studied in a school where there were no ECs and extracurriculars , eventually i built a decent profile and the only thing that mattered to me was the 12th grade marks. i literally studied till 3-4 am sacrificed everything and all my exams went well i had no regret

until the result came where i was expecting at worst 95% but boom i got 91.6% which literally destroyed my dreams in a second and my majority of marks were gone in eco and eng in app maths , bst and acc i got 96 96 and 97 and in eco and eng i got 85 and 84 respectively .. I legit cried the whole day and when i was scrolling through subreddits like indianstudyabroad etc. i was seeing people who scored literally 96-98% my morale went soo much down because of all that and its still down. now idk i have to take admission to NMIMS or christ both shit colleges . my abroad dreams are totally shattered because of this osm experiment even tho after reval my eco marks can me increased by 5-6 and eng by 1-2 but ab fayda kya vaise bhi ye log revalued marks bhi july tak denge tab tak saari university ka decisions bhi aa jayega . looks like the whole destiny is literally against me and whatever i try i never succeed in that even my parents are also not supporting me ( they never did ) they keep on telling me to prepare yourself to be in NMIMS or christ .

in the end of the day i think i might not be able to escape this big hellhole and i am stuck here forever. my trust has totally broken in this education system. idk what i am gonna do now atp i don't even want to go to college