34[M4F] help a shy guy to explore his kinky side

Can't fight my horny side but also don't have a lot of success IRL, probably because I'm either too shy or too direct. So maybe I can get some experience and a good penpal here. We can discuss kinks, stories and preferences: I like masochistic girls for example, but again I need a clear signal that this is really what you want. Also it doesn't have to be about sex all the time, I work as a software engineer and make music.