Am I genderless, a boy, or somehow both?

So I want to look like a girl (just with a flat chest, less curves, and broader shoulders) but be seen as a boy. I don't wish I was born a boy, has that would make it more difficult to look feminine, I don't want to take testosterone for the same reason. But I still really wanna be seen as a boy. I don't have much sense of gender, so I don't really know if I feel like a boy or just someone who's genderless that likes being called a boy. I feel like my version of "male" doesn't fit in with the way society sees men, it's like I created my own little version. I don't feel comfortable with other men, but that goes the same with everyone regardless of gender haha

Asking cuz if I end up as a transboy, then uhhh I'll have to do a lot of self reflection.

I may be overcomplicating things... This all feels so silly, so I apologize. I hope this all makes sense. I know I won't know what my gender is for sure for a while, and I know I won't suddenly know my gender asking this, as gender overall is very personal. but I thought I'd ask to get some ideas floating. Life is confusing, but overall I'm trying my best! :)