How do I not get obliterated

Ok so I have been smoking for 6 years but always preferred real flower but use pens and carts cuz there easy and no smell but I feel like I'm either just a lil calm or sent to the shadow realm no in-between which in my opinion is best for playing video games is there a way to not just get completely obliterated but still feel good so I can actually play games with my pen any tips or do I just have to suffer?