I want a new life

Okay so I’m gonna start this out by saying I’m a little drunk right now so I am kind of in my feels (I hope that doesn’t get this post taken down). I am a 24 year old female. Basically I want to start a new life. I’m so depressed I don’t know what to do with myself. I think about suicide every day. I don’t want to hurt my family or leave my dog behind. I’ve been drinking a lot more just to feel okay. I don’t have a job. I don’t have friends. I feel worthless to my family because I don’t have a job. I don’t have any skills and I’m pretty useless as a human being. I’m very caring and compassionate but what does that matter? I’ve wasted all my potential. I just wish I could rewind the clock. How do I go on? I know I’m gonna get like 4 comments on this if I’m lucky but what do I do? Why should I continue to exist? I just want to be something. To feel anything other than crippling anxiety and depression. I wish I could just run and leave everything behind, hopefully heaven exists