Need a little help 55F 65M

# For reference I am a 55F and my husband is 65. We have been married a little over 2 years and have been together a total of a little over 5. This isn’t either of ours first rodeo, but I, at least was hoping it would be my last. Here goes, our sex life was GREAT until about a year after our marriage. He is older, never has had a problem getting hard, but often he had a problem finishing. We have tried many different things/ways to try to get him there. I’m sure it is extremely frustrating for him. He says, however that he enjoys the act and enjoys seeing me climax, which I do multiple times each session. Now, everything has changed. We went from sex everyday to now having had sex 2 times in a year. We have had some emotional disruptions, (my dad died, his beloved pet of 12 years past away, the death of a grandchild, etc.) I do not take any of that lightly and have struggled as well. The last major trauma was over a year ago. He says now that he doesn’t like having sex because he can’t climax. He doesn’t ever want to touch me in any way. He does, however touch himself all the time. ALL the time. He constantly has his hand down his pants and tries his best to hide it. He wakes me up every night with the bed moving from him masturbating. When I can’t take it any more I tell him to cut it out so I can sleep. He pretends to be asleep our says I’m crazy, he’s not doing anything. Over the last weekend I decided to get my phone out hit record. The first night alone he had his hands in his pants for over 3 hours. The next night, he went to bed first, but continued to play with himself off and on for about 2 hours. Please help me here. For reference, I have made it clear that if he wants to masturbate, GREAT!! It turns me on just to watch and I can take care of myself while watching him. His response is he doesn’t like to touch himself. I told him if he doesn’t he’s the only one I have ever met who didn’t. Any advice? What do I need to do? I love him, but I am willing to stay on a marriage with no physical intimacy. And now, I think this may have turned the corner to emotional abuse by telling me I’m crazy when I call him out on what he is doing. I’m really hurting here TL;DR ANY ADVICE?