There is NO REWARD in knowing that I did my job well

Many people, truly, wholeheartedly, sincerely believe that the way to defeat toxic people is competence, procedural knowledge, documentation, and understanding the system better than they do.

In other words:

Learn the rules.

Learn accountability structures.

Know policy.

Know procedure.

Know where authority actually sits.

Do your best.

Let the toxic person eventually hang themselves.

Yeah so….All of THAT is a fantasy 

Treat my experience as the case study. That shit did not work.

Am I just being dramatically cynical. Ha!

No.

What is so extra crazy revealing in my situation is that I was one of my toxic employer’s “star employees" (not even exaggerating). I was able to do specialized work for the event managers that used our (FedEx) location for signage and graphic design, formatting, and material QCs large enough in scale to advertise throughout a Resort. I was responsible for huge amounts of time sensitive projects that the entire store's operations hinged on, I was the one who would have to cover for people calling out, staying late, arriving early, extending myself into our warehouse operations for our convention center operations coordinating freight and shipping…

and the harasser???

Listen….Worse employee I've ever seen anywhere....refused to be trained (no really) because as she claimed she was "already familiar with it", what she did know she refused to do 95% of any of that, she could not even format a 5x7 postcard (which I personally had to fix for a customer), she cut OFF the sides of posters she called herself trimming for a customer who was on a tight schedule (they came back to complain and I had to rush to re-do the whole thing), she regularly refused to do anything that required physical exertion (AT fucking FEDEX which is insane), constantly took time off, rude to customers, not to mention terrorizing ME for over a year........My employer still protected her over me....I was the one disregarded, dismissed, disrespected, and subjected to dehumanizing, demoralizing treatment.

Gotta say when I hear people say things like I should take comfort in knowing that I did my job well at the end of the day. 

Please, for what?

I DID do my job way better than my harasser. I am the one who constantly extended myself, vying for promotions that were being denied to me in retaliation, just to get monumental amounts of work done for a corporation that spit in my face and discarded me like trash and they KEPT her/the harasser......there is NO REWARD in knowing that I did my job well and she did not because it MEANT NOTHING. It still MEANS NOTHING.

FedEx knowingly protected the KNOWN abuser instead.

I take no pride in serving a predator well. That would be crazy.