Weird anxiety about my favourite band

So two things: I love twenty one pilots and have for over a decade now. And I have had a lot of bad experiences with dissociation, derealization, and depersonalization. For that reason, the idea of things being “real” often feels very important to me.

I think I saw a couple of posts that triggered this thought process. One was on reddit talking about how Tyler Joseph (lead singer of 21p) was sick and using autotune during a festival performance. Then I saw one of those videos with the click bait caption of “proof Tyler Joseph doesn’t need autotune” and all of the comments were flooded with “he is literally caked in autotune in this clip.” And I couldn’t hear it. I don’t know how “autotune” works. And I feel like that word encompasses a lot of tools musicians use to sound good during their recordings or live performances. But something in me equates the concept of autotune with “that’s not what they actually sound like when they sing.” And that FREAKS ME OUT!! This band I have loved for so long… I might not know what they actually sound like? My brain very quickly goes to “it’s all fake then.”

I saw a comment that said “I’ve worked in the music industry for years and I can confirm Tyler uses autotune in everything.” And my brain is so stressed by this!! It’s so silly!! I recognize it’s silly but god it feels so real. Because I’m starting to think of it while listening to their music.

And I’m posting this here because I know if I posted it in any other subreddit all the comments would be reassuring me or trying to give me facts. And it fucking sucks because oh my god I want the facts. I want to know what kind of autotune he uses if any. I wanna see clips of him singing without it compared to clips where it’s noticeable. I WANT REASSURANCE AHHH BUT I CANT.

This is seriously such a silly thing to be anxious over and I don’t want to dismiss or downplay my feelings and anxiety but sometimes you gotta laugh at the ridiculous thoughts this disorder gives you.