Will I find my "tribe?"

"you will find your tribe" is what my dads friend keeps saying. But I just don't know.

I see my dad go out with his fishing buddies and feel this pang of longing for something like that. I see pictures of my sister with all her friends in her room or on her Instagram and I feel the stench of jealousy engulf me. I'm hoping my new job results in some semblance of a friend--ive just been watching their rapport from afar, and awkwardly struck up conversations when I could, feeling out of place as the newbie, her to be integrated. And It's a closing shift--im gonna be more alone than I thought, once the training period is over.

This same friend said I was part of her tribe. I guess thats all I got for now and it's pretty good, I guess. I just long for people my age. I long for the connection I thought I had with my old friends, who all ghosted me for a reason unexplained 2 years later. I long for pictures of this mysterious "tribe" and I at concerts, arcades, the movies. I long for hugs even though I hate them, I long for shoulders to cry on, I long for inside jokes and sleepovers and just about everything any sort of companionship entails.

I have tears in my eyes. Thinks have been going so good for me mentally and physically, but loneliness has its way with you sometimes, no matter how well you're doing.

Will I ever find that elusive tribe? When will it be? Please don't tell me it'll be years from now. I can only drown myself in self help apps journal entries and fleeting moments with customers for so long. I'll do whatever it takes. I just want this empty feeling of not belonging to stop.