My mental health is deteriorating

I (16f) am on summer break, which usually is like “new beginnings” and whatnot but for the past like 10 months I’ve felt like I’m going insane.

I have an objectively *good* life, I have a loving and typically healthy relationship, I have friends, I have hobbies, I don’t have to worry about bills, nobody is abusing me. Yes, I had a bad past but that’s just that… the past.

I’m usually a very energetic person, I have two disorders, generalized anxiety disorder and post-traumatic stress disorder. However, my biggest issue has always been anxiety, I’ve never been depressive and if I am I’m very high functioning. I am very strict on keeping things tidy, showering nightly, etc.

Lately, I have no energy. I am barely able to keep things clean. I don’t want to clean. I shower, but my room is a mess. I’m always angry and treating my boyfriend horribly now, I don’t feel like myself and even my favorite hobbies aren’t helping. Yesterday, I got nauseous and threw up twice due to pure stress despite it being a good day.

I’m so put up. Usually, I see some sort of silver lining but all I ever think about anymore is death. Like, killing myself. I know have options, but I don’t care enough to exhaust them. I thoroughly give up. Idk. Thanks for reading