Not sure where to post, need advice.

I’m a man in his late 20s and im experiencing the same dilemma seemingly every couple of weeks now.

Young women 18-32 in various different contexts show intense interest in me, as far as flirting goes. I don’t want a relationship right now, but I do want to have sex. The thing is that I am scared they’ll fall in love and be destroyed when I eventually reaffirm my wish to not be in a relationship with them.

It’s happened twice already and honestly I’m too much of an empath to not feel terrible even if I’m completely transparent from the get go.

I’ve done a tremendous amount of healing from all kinds of trauma (murdered father when I was a kid, criminals and corrupt government officials harassing my family out of my country, sisters with BPD and bipolar, and more) which naturally makes me someone that is great at handling life in whatever shape or form. I consider myself to be an alchemist. I turn shit into gold, metaphorically of course.

I’ve never felt guilt with sex until the past year. I used to be more “free” until a deeply painful breakup, and ever since then I’ve been more hesitant to engage women. They always want more, and I feel guilty when I don’t reciprocate.

It’s as if I start projecting the bad ending from my breakup and other previous women I’ve been with when I start sensing attraction for another woman.

I feel like the biggest fucking idiot. This is typical “oh no my steak is too juicy and my lobster is too buttery”, but it feels like if I engage with a woman it’ll end up with her hurting deeply because she can’t have me in her life indefinitely.

I’m tired of this. I want to be able to explore my sexuality freely, but something within me tells me I can’t. What in the fuck?