Blindsided 3 days ago

Just found out my partner of almost 6 years (we own a home, have a 2.5yr old child, a dog and what I thought was a very happy life together) has been living a double life for a YEAR AND A HALF! I discovered a birthday card to him in his glove compartment of his work car from another woman. Confronted him and he confessed (but still lied about details). I demanded we call his AP and got the full story: he had fully convinced her that he and I were fully separated but still living in separate rooms under the same roof while we navigated an exit plan and continued coparenting our then 8 month old son. She was very upset with him and apologetic to me. They were very much in a relationship as boyfriend girlfriend. In love. No travel, but gifts were purchased for Christmas. She said they talked about marriage and kids a few times. He says it wasn't a serious convo, she said she'd like to give our son a sibling and he told her she'd be a good mom. He and I were going to be trying for baby #2 this summer lol

How do people navigate this with children?!!! This is complete torture. He does the fucking but I'm the one getting fucked in the end. Our poor son didn't ask for this. I feel like he robbed me of my motherhood and my family dream. We have a therapy appointment in a few days. What should I expect? Is it even worth it? I plan to seek out my own betrayal trauma therapist...but holy shit. What does reconciliation look like? I feel like I'm failing my toddler by not being able to say I still fought for our family during my darkest days.