This is gonna be a long post and i seriously need some advice so please only genuine people who wants to help read this rest other can ignore. Around a year back I had posted this and during that time like after a week my girlfriend agreed and said she was wrong she won't be in contact with her ex anymore that she sees future with me i believed her and forgot whatever happened. Then our families got closed we were sharing many memories with each other being their for each other, tbh i made her my everything I lost contact with most of my frds. It was only her and her in my life we both were talking 24/7 yes we were fighting also alot but i thought that's normal in a relationship and i made her meet my family most of my relatives knows her. so during a period the situation between us got worse alot that even our families were suggesting that we should stay apart for some time and they asked us not to be in contact with each other but we both were secretively in contact with each other and tbh I changed myself for her fully I was calm I was understanding her I was being there for here and idk why she started crying on video calls every time we were on a call she started crying so one day she told me to end the video call and she wanted to confess something she told me during the time her ex came to say sorry she went to his home and they both kissed and she was the one who initiated the kiss idk after that my life has been hell at start i cursed her I told her family what she has done but she then hurted herself in order to ignore facing everyone and then her family asked me to stay away from her this made my desperation much worse like i was the one who was hurted and her family acted like she has done nothing wrong then also she was my first love idk why I showed care for her and she came said sorry to me and all and i tried forgiving her ( if I am being honest I used to think I am with her more for intimacy reasons but tbh after breakup I reached my bottom) I almost lost my job, my image in front of my parents was ruined i was in contact with her for few times and my parents lost trust in me. But now I have accepted that chp is over now but idk i am still facing those breakup difficulties like deleting her pics throwing her gifts that okay but now my condition idk if it's normal or what. I have started loving weekdays as I go to work keep myself busy in that and come home tired and sleep weekends are hell for me all those memories hits new new scenarios in my mind i have stopped studying idk i can't focus only I tried I don't go to gym I have got addicted to porn daily night I am watching porn when I am not tired without porn i can't sleep only and I am using tinder and bumble but as I am not a camera guy i am not that successful on that also and idk i am scared of relationships now idk what I am doing with my life I am just living it and hoping something would change ik i have to be the one who change things but idk it's not happening I am just chatting with a chat bot or with a frd about my this trauma and then spending and wasting my days please someone help me to get out of this trap and use my Teenage days to something productive. ( I have tried to explain my situation in very short manner there are many incidents i can't write here like she slapping me for nothing her family disrespecting mine and many more but all these would waste ur time it's just after all this I accept her and yes she is a diabetic patient I also had zero problem with that )

Need advice how to move further