Ive decided to leave my abusive husband and I need advice on how to strategically make an exit plan

Im 23f (soon to be Ex husband m24), im 13 weeks pregnant, have a 2 year old and 10m old daughters. When I first got pregnant my husband began to be emotionally and verbally abusive, I did the classic thing of burying my head in the sand and telling myself it was stress as we were dealing with financial stress at the time as a young newly married couple expecting a baby so soon after marriage (he was insistent on not waiting a year to get pregnant). It escalated to him getting in my face, puting his hands around my throat but not actually choking me (yet), he started telling me how he wishes we lived in "the old times" where he could "put me in my place and no one would put him in prison"

I was freshly postpartum when he started being aggressive toward our baby, not physically abusive or anything that "crossed the line" but he would make me nervous around her. He eventually started shoving me here and there and I didnt know what to do bc it didnt feel like "real abuse" bc he never just outright hit me, but he slapped me so hard in the back of the head that my ears rang and I started thinking that maybe I was being actually abused.

Well, when our baby was about 2m old he tried to aggressively grab her out of my arms and bc im a protective new mom I told him to "dont fucking touch her" and he reacted by grabbing me around the throat HARD and pushing/dragging me backward by my throat from our kitchen to the living room and pinning me down on the couch all while im still holding our 2m old. I just froze hoping he'd let go on his own but he didnt so I tried to move his hand and he let go and I fell onto the floor sobbing.

He told me to go to our bedroom and "shut her up" bc our baby was crying now, on the way to the bedroom he was following me taunting me and took my phone out of my back pocket. I start feeding our baby and mentally planning to leave. He got in the shower I just told him whatever he wanted to hear so he wouldnt get angry and to buy me some time.

I still remember how calm and happy he seemed going to get a shower and how confident he was that I would be in the same spot waiting for him once he finished his shower. I tiptoed out of our bedroom once I heard him actually enter the shower and started packing a bag for just my baby and our documents. He heard me i guess when I opened the front door bc i had my baby in the car and was fast walking to my side of the car when he came out in his underwear and begged for me to stay which I drove away for a few hours and eventually came back and he begged me to give him at least a chance to change....and I did.

That was a couple months after our first anniversary and now here I am, with a 2 year old, a 10m old, and 13 weeks pregnant. We just had our 3rd anniversary last month. I was going to give him til our 5th anniversary to change but tonight after not physically threatening me for a while he grabbed me by the throat and squeezed hard bc he was annoyed at a joke I made. And when I went to walk away he grabbed the back of my throat and shoved me while holding our 10m old.

As pathetic as it sounds I could've stayed married to him for the rest of my life if we had no kids. Something about having two little girls and another on the way made me really think about what they might grow up seeing me tolerate and one day thinking love is suposed to look like this.

Im a stay at home mom and im working on getting a certificate for medical billing and coding so I can get some of my own income started. We're planning on me getting a job and puting our kids in daycare so we can "save up more money quicker" so we can move out of his parents house as we had to move in with them last October due to unforseen circumstances. Its a perfect opportunity I think to get my certification, get my babies established in daycare and work and when it comes time to school our kids I will refuse to homeschooling our kids (that was the plan) and hopefully I can push off seperation til the baby is at least a year old so I wont have to fool with breastfeeding while co parenting but I need advice on whats the best source of action

It will take about 8 more months to finish my certificate and then i have to give birth, find a job, and start building. I still have my pre marriage bank account in my maiden name, can I move money there and not be penalized for it? Money he cant touch in a divorce? What other steps do I need to take? If the situation become emergent (he doenst lay a finger on the kids right now and as long as he doesnt im willing to play the long game) then ill leave immediately but im trying to get my crap together before leaving so it wont be all on me.

What advice do you have that can help me exit this marriage safely? I will be recording any marks left on my body but hes only ever left marks on my neck and sometimes face with how hard he grabs me. Is that enough for evidence of physical abuse to get custody of our children? I worry about separating while the youngest two are too little to tell me if their dad hurts them if he doesnt leave a mark??? How do I go about this???? Any advice is appreciated