its over ):

im turnin 18 tomorrow and yay thats cool i guess? yay i have rights and can get that tattoo i want but

i cant go to the kids doctors anymore ): past year theyve started telling me "only one toy we gotta save some for the kids instead of the LITTLE kids"

most of my friends are around 12 but now that im finally a chrono-adult it feels so weird to hang with them. it feels like theres no excuse anymore. no more hey but im a kid too! because legally im not anymore.... they started referring to me as their uncle and i love being support for them but i still feel like theyre older than me ):

i cant pretend that 17 is just a little kid like i tend to bank on with people, because i dont even have the "im a minor" excuse. as of tomorrow ill have all the rights in the world and i dont even know how to take care of myself still. i want to move out of the home im in because its only filled with bad memories but im so scared to do so. its silly but one of my biggest fears is how is santa going to know where to find me if i leave?

i dont want to lose the only good friends i have but im scared of getting in trouble for talking to them. it feels so bad having to be hidden in the bushes when parents roll around. i just want to be seen as one of them ): im just a kid too ):

i feel like im in such a weird limbo right now. im so lonely and i dont know what to do. i dont vibe with anyone my age,, even when i do feel my age they feel so alien because even when i feel like an actual 18yo.... im an 18yo living in 2016. i dont get all this new stuff, my interests never shifted with the times. looking at people my own age or even a bit older seems like theyre in a complete different generation than me if that makes sense? they seem so much younger