Did I dodge a bullet, or did I lose someone worth fighting for?

I'm a 28-year-old with no children of my own. I'm looking for honest feedback because I've been struggling with this situation.

I started dating a 24-year-old woman in December 2025. She has four children (ages 6, 5, 3, and 1) from three different fathers.

Early in the relationship, she told me about abuse she had experienced from some of her exes. One of her children's fathers is currently in jail for auto theft and had allegedly choked and physically assaulted her in the past. Another father of one of her children had also allegedly been physically abusive. Because she often told me she was afraid for her safety, I would stay overnight with her to help her feel protected.

Throughout the relationship, I provided significant financial support. I paid for her car, phone bill, electric bill, food, gas, clothing for the children, loan payments, and other expenses.

The first major issue occurred when I discovered she had another man, a 45-year-old military veteran, staying overnight at her house while I was at work. I chose to forgive her and continue the relationship.

Later, she began communicating with a police officer. As far as I know, nothing happened between them, but it created additional trust issues.

The final straw was discovering that the father of her youngest child was spending the night at her house. This is the same man she had previously called me about, claiming she feared him and that he would show up at her home. When I confronted her, she did not believe she had done anything wrong.

She told me that she wanted to be with both of us and expected me to continue helping pay her bills and support her household, even though the children are not mine. Recently, she posted photos of herself with her ex on social media.

At that point, I blocked her on everything and even changed my phone number because she continued calling me from private numbers. What confused me most is that she would often call me telling me she loved me and wanted to be with me, even while still involved with the other man.

For context, she has been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder, was reportedly a runaway as a teenager, and spent time in a mental health institution in 2020. I'm not mentioning this to judge her, but because it may be relevant to understanding the situation.

I'm heartbroken because I genuinely cared about her and her children. At the same time, part of me feels like I was being used financially and emotionally.

Based on what I've described, does this sound like I dodged a bullet, or am I walking away from someone who could have changed? I'm looking for honest perspectives.