Recently divorced and so lost in my own mind.

Recently divorced (my decision) now and just don't know what I want, need, or even really care about anymore. Part of me wants to find love again, part of me wants to be alone, part of me wants to be wild and explore, and the other part says to never do that or share those desires or feelings.

I feel my mind fights with its self everyday and it is so tiring. (yes I have my anti depressants lol). I want to be able to explore my desires and not feel bad about them and hope that maybe I can find someone to be free and myself with, without the fear of being judged (like I felt in the marriage for)

I just don't know anymore, and it is just hard. And maybe I think it is hard and I am just making it all up in my mind.

Thank you for the space and will keep my head up for the possibility of HEA.