(burner acct) I was a fool and told myself I loved her so much that I could live with what she’d done to me in the throes of her alcoholism.

I let her back into my life and our apartment after a month of separation due to the ex parte order I filed against her, then I married her less than a year later, and we bought a house together.

She is brilliant, charming, and beautiful. Our chemistry is off the charts (physically and intellectually), but she is a master at semantics manipulation, and has zero humility regarding what she put me through before we were married. She says that I did it to her, but she was dying from alcohol abuse right in front of me, lying about being drunk, and she even hit me and broke my glasses for yelling back at her. It was hell, and she flat out says that she didn’t put me through hell.

I can’t ask her to not do things that upset me without her flipping it on me, and being accused of about to go into a spiral when I ask for a reasonably satisfactory response. I then ask her why she thinks that saying something like that is constructive, and then… It’s on.

I’m now in therapy. Do I continue work on what I can do to mitigate these terrible fights, not knowing what she’s doing to help herself, or do I just leave?