Scared and seeking helpful advice – lumbar ADR

Hi. I have posted twice seeking specific answers without receiving responses, which is understandable. (I have now taken down those posts.) I’m trying once more, with a general request for advice from those similarly situated, or who were in the past themselves or someone close to them.

I have had back pain for years, but it has grown significantly worse (I lead a very physically active lifestyle). I used to be able to power through, make modifications and get back to a base level that allowed me to live well. However, now I find my world slowly shrinking from cutting out activities, trips and simply not enjoying things as much anymore because of the pain, fear of pain, and restriction. Mentally, it is truly quite terrifying at times.

I have degenerated discs at L4 L5 (basically bone on bone) and L5 S1. I do not have spinal stability issues, and have great DEXA scores. I am very healthy and generally very fit. I have sharp, stabbing pain in my lower back; referred intense pain in my right hip, numbness down my right leg into my foot, cramping hip flexors, and rarely sharp pain down my right leg.

The first surgeon I met with wants to do multi-level fusion, accessing both from the front and the back. The more I look into this, it simply terrifies me.

Another surgeon does not recommend fusion, rather ADR at the two levels (granted that is his specialty). I am awaiting more consultation feedback from others.

ADR seems to be a better fit for me and my desire to continue with my active lifestyle. But with which surgeon? And, I’ve also had the opinion that I should do a hybrid procedure - ADR at L4-L5, and fusion at L5-S1. Not loving that idea, but I understood the thought process behind it.

I cannot seem to stop myself from going down a multitude of internet rabbit holes. Both about the surgical procedures, and the surgeons themselves. Do I rely on someone who provides an interview on a podcast and says everything went great for them with this surgeon? There are quite a few of those out there, as well as other testimonials praising or maligning surgeons without factual explanations. If you look for it, there will be something that makes you doubt whatever decision you reach. I’m fully convinced of that.

How do I make an intelligent decision when there’s so much divergent information out there including about the surgeons themselves. I just want to feel safe and confident with the person who will be operating on my spine.

I have prepared myself to pay the enormous cost for this procedure. It will definitely impact me financially a tremendous amount, but it is worth my quality of life. To not do something about this, to simply live with the pain and limitations, truly terrifies me, mentally.

Every time I think I have finally made a decision, I read a post, study, article, etc. that has me completely doubting my decision. And all of the flashy advertising with ADR doctors is not providing me much comfort either - salesmanship in general makes me nervous when it comes to making major medical decisions for my body.

I have rambled on for far too long now, but I hope this will resonate with someone who has helpful advice, or words of encouragement for me. Truly appreciate anyone who has read this far, thank you.