Aitah?? Mom and Marriage

I am 27 right now you know ideal time to get married and all that but I have gone through a lot of stuff in my personal life (when I was 23) such as my mom cheating on my dad. Keep in mind my mom is still at home sleeps in the same room as my dad yet they both are divorced and during the entire process of this cheating, I found out a lot of information and I was involved in it when I shouldn’t have been at the age of 23. And I had seen some crazy things from my mom and I’ve heard some crazy things that my mom said about me and my sister. Some of those things being oh I wish you guys were never my children or you all are dead to me or I never loved you. So because of that I don’t want to get married because it was traumatic when I went through and I just never want to go through that again. Second reason I don’t want to get married is because I haven’t found the right person.

So my mom every time she calls me since I was maybe 23 years old she always brings up the topic of marriage and how she wants me to marry and how she wants me to do this or do that and it always says get married get married and I hate it. So yesterday I told her that I don’t want to get married because of everything that happened so then she played the victim card and said “oh you should let go of that whatever happened was in the past what happened with me doesn’t necessarily mean needs to happen to you” which I agree with but again I went through and it was traumatic. so she tried to understand and I appreciate that but then again starting today she brings up the same conversation on the phone with me and my 20 year-old sister saying how her friends kids are getting married and she’s so excited for us to get married and she’s talking to my sister who’s 20 years old not even finished with college when we both know the conversation was directed at me so instead of causing any issues I just said hey I will talk to you later.

So after the call ended, she comes to me crying and she tells me oh you’re such a bad daughter oh yeah, I gave you birth, but it feels like I don’t have any right to say anything to you anymore. And how it’s unfair that she can’t even have a conversation with me without me taking it the wrong way and all this and that granted I did not even say anything to her after that conversation on the phone I just let it go. But here she is comparing me with all of these other people saying oh all of my friends kids don’t behave this way oh they listen to their parents or they do this and they do that.

So am I the asshole for getting upset when I have told her that I don’t want to talk about this topic yet she continues to?