Going the donor route - crushed

My wife and I did an IVF cycle back in 2024 which resulted in two embryos. My count was extremely low, but was decent enough at the time. One embryo resulted in a loss at 6 weeks which was devastating. The second never took.

We did another round in the summer of 2025 with my frozen sperm because the fresh sample showed no movement. That round resulted in two abnormal embryos. More disappointment.

Fast forward to now, I’m officially shooting blanks. We’re going to go the donor route. I am feeling so all over the place because my wife deserves to be a mother more than anything in the world. She has watched each of her sidtwra have kids and has been the best aunt.

Of course I want to be a dad, but I can’t help but feel crushed. I feel like I am more going through with this to see her as a mom and I feel terrible for that. I don’t know how to get over this feeling. I hope I am able to, because the thought of my wife not being a mom is as painful as the losses we’ve suffered.

I had so much hope two years ago that I’d have biological kids someday and that dream is officially crushed. To those who have gone the donor route, is there any advice you can give me? I appreciate any and all feedback.