How do you cope with being Asexual, but not Aromantic?

I’m entering my mid twenties, and I’ve come to the harsh realization that I am asexual, but not aromantic.
I hoped I would be a late bloomer when it came to sex. I tried forcing a libido by drowning myself in drugs and alcohol for a few years, but it wasn’t enough. I hoped by bettering myself and finally being comfortable in my own skin would allow me to be vulnerable and intimate, but it doesn’t. I just can’t do sex.

I genuinely wouldn’t have a problem with this if I was also aromantic, but I’m not and that’s what makes this so hard. So many relationships have crumbled because I reject sex. I gave up someone I love because he is hypersexual and I knew I couldn’t meet his desires. Even after years since I left him I still beat myself up because of my asexuality. If I could just change this one aspect about myself, then I think my life would be completely different.