worst night of my life

yesterday was one of the worst night of my life. god it’s so fucking horrible to see someone u care about acting like that. i keep seeing his face screaming in my dreams or whenever i close my eyes. and it just kept going and going and god it was so awful. i can’t imagine what he was feeling, i feel so bad for him. he kept saying he’s dying and even though he was hallucinating, he thought it was real and what a harrowing thing to experience. his screams were ear curdling and i just couldn’t describe his face even if i tried. it’s imprinted in my memory.

there were times i was so scared and actually believed something was gonna happen to him just from the way he was describing things and how severe his reactions and descriptions were. it was so fucking scary omg i didn’t even get time to properly cry. i remember shedding tears at the hospital but then i had to go get his admission done while my friend went to talk to the doctors about what he was experiencing and then we had to go upstairs with him and it was just go go go. i’m glad he’s okay now and i hope he never fucking does THC in his life.

i couldn’t sleep at night either. i kept waking up either from nightmares or from the compulsion to check on him and then in between he got cold and stole my blanket too so i just stayed awake for some time freezing.

i’m sad that this was our last trip and this is how it had to end. that entire day was wasted and ofc i don’t want to say that to him but i am very sad about that. nothing can be done now it’s just time to get back to studying.