Really drunk at work

So I just got a job after being unemployed for 20 months. I work in tech and just moved to San Francisco. I also developed a compulsive gambling problem while I was unemployed. Anyway! My office has unlimited self serve tap beer after 4 pm. Today I got drunk until 7 and then left the office when I think security arrived. I’m on clonazepam, lamictal, sertraline and naltrexone for my gambling. Some days I kinda just want to shoot myself. I’m 6 months clean of gambling, have a 8 year gf and friends and family. Been diagnosed for 4 years. But right now I’m drunk and wanted to make this post. I’m scared of myself