College admissions are too easy

I feel like the whole college admissions process has gotten too easy. Personally, I'd like to see:

• meaner, scarier admissions officers;
• more confusing deadlines (with fewer reminders);
• more early application options (I'm thinking ED -1, ED -2, etc.—the sky's the limit!);
• more hyper-unique supplemental essay prompts (so each has to be written from scratch);
• less free advice on Reddit;
• less emotional support and encouragement all around;
• higher application fees;
• more obsession with Ivy+ programs, to the exclusion of all others;
• and, most importantly, more college mailers from random-ass schools jam-packing everybody's mailboxes and making it completely and utterly impossible to find your real mail amidst the junk.

With these changes, I'm confident we can elevate college admissions to the confusing, cutthroat, bureaucratic quagmire it was always meant to be. Happy to take additional suggestions.