as an adult, i still feel abandoned by my mom - am i overreacting?

hey all,

i’m actively in therapy, working on myself for the last five years, but still sting when i feel neglected by my mother, and i’m not sure if i’m overreacting. i would love to know your take on this.

my mom immigrated to the US when i was 12. i stayed in our home country living with an aunt until 26yo, when i graduated college and decided to move here too to pursue my PhD. during those 14 years away from my mother, i felt abandoned and a bit like a orphan, especially because my aunt was lovely but also volatile and aggressive at times.

now i can recognize the emotional effect that had on me, and how it informs my romantic, professional, and personal life. i’ve become a loner overachiever, among other things. i recently got a job at a prestigious university, so had to move states and create a home somewhere else.

my mom had promised she would come to help me set the apartment, which i appreciate it, since it’s a lot of work for just one person. but she bailed on me last minute, saying she was not feeling well and has to take care of herself, which i obviously agree.

but that happened in other ocasions, where i think she feels exploited or just too tired, and don’t do things a normal mom would because she already spent 20 years of her life working really hard to offer me material conditions to succeed. and, now i’m succeeding, i feel so distant from her

i sent her pics of the apartment completely organized, she said nothing yet, and it’s hurting me, because i feel she’s once again not available to me while i accomplish a big milestone. it’s not the first time, and i know she’s glued to her phone. it’s a very bittersweet feeling.

am i overreacting?