Extreme memory loss because of stress?

I am a 18 yr old girl. 5'2, weight 47kg. I have been experiencing extreme dissociation since 2024 December. And i am lately getting very concerned. I have been going through something horrible alongside 24/7 of intrusive thoughts. The last few days I can barely remember anything from them. Even though something major happened. I cant say its trauma because im the one who was the "villian" so to speak. And today I did something "very bad" and I cant remember it. Im freaking out. It only happened six hours ago. Also i keep forgetting things every 5 minutes even though I told myself to keep trying to remember it. And I mean every 5 minutes