How to support a friend through depression and unemployment?
Sorry the title makes this sound a lot more dramatic than it is. it isnt THAT terrible. We're both uni students and 2nd year internships have been the bane of our existence. It's been horrid and it's ruining everybody's lives because companies just don't want anybody anymore!! But I think the bit that makes it hard is that she makes all of her own money bc her parents got laid off recently. And she's got all of the qualifications and everything it's just constantly been a bunch of inconveniences that've prevented her from getting a job. She got accepted at a policy journal and then they decided last minute they wanted it to be a 6-month long internship and due to student visa work rights they picked someone else last minute. The other one she got accepted for an interview and when she went in to give it they realised they'd emailed her with the wrong position so she'd prepared for something else entirely. So none of these were even...her fault?? Anyways it's been kinda bad now she had a bit of a depressive episode and has just given up. She seems to be okay with the idea of not having anything for the summer. And I know her and she's usually really good at getting on with things so i know that she will find a way out of this - or even just find a way to be okay with this. but i don't know how to support her. i've always gotten internships through connections and i dont need the money the way she does. and coming from a place of privilege like that a lot of what i say just sounds stupid. because i can't just say "it'll be okay" or "you didn't need it anyway." i know i don't understand the struggle in the way she does and im so worried constantly about sounding ignorant or oblivious ive realised i say nothing at all. which is so much worse. we just skirt around the topic or never bring it up. and that isn't a good thing to do. because i know its something that's occupying most of her thoughts and her time and if her best friend can barely talk to her about it it's just horrible.
im not even sure of what im asking for on here. maybe if someone's been through something similar - what was it you wanted to hear in times like that? would you want me to keep pushing you to apply for things? i would suggest helping her but im not half as smart as she is and would be of no help to her applications or anything. i just want to know what would truly help her through this, as a support system is all. any sort of advice would be helpful i guess. thank you!
Posted Jun 11, 2026, 9:20 PM UTC