What should i do. Wait more time?

I'm M31, she's F24.

We met about a year ago. We hooked up one night, met again a few weeks later, and agreed we didn't want anything serious — just fun. We live apart and our lives aren't really compatible, so we started meeting only when we felt like it: random dinner dates, a weekend watching movies, and then each of us getting back to our own lives until the next time.

I guess you could call it a situationship. We could go a whole month without talking, then I'd message her, and if we were both free we'd meet up again — good conversations, good moments. It was genuinely a good time for both of us and a way to decompress from our stressful lives. We both have demanding, high-pressure jobs.

This dynamic has been going on since September 2025, so it's not something recent — the pattern has been building over months. For most of that time it worked well for both of us.

Then about 4 months ago things shifted. I've sent her multiple messages and the answer is always some version of "I'm super busy, going through a lot of changes, not in the mood, don't have the energy, I just need time." I followed up again later, told her I felt like we were losing touch and asked if something had changed — she said everything is the same, that I shouldn't worry, she just needs to process some stressful changes in her life and needs space.

She eventually agreed to meet for dinner — just to catch up. A friendly dinner. The conversation flowed completely normally, just like our other dinner dates. But this time she didn't come home with me. The excuse was that she had to get back to her place because her mother needed her. It felt like just that — an excuse. She also asked me to accept it without making her feel bad, because if I seemed sad or disappointed, she would feel guilty for not coming.

After that we kept texting occasionally, but she feels cold. A week ago I told her I missed our time at my place — watching movies, cuddling, talking about life, having sex. I told her it felt like therapy and that I really missed it. She gave me the same answer again: "I honestly understand that, but I don't have the emotional availability or the mood for it right now. I'm going through a lot of changes and need time, that's why I've been distant."

I'm not in love with her and I'm not looking for anything serious or permanent — I've always been clear on that. What I value is what we had: a genuine connection, good moments, and a space where we both could decompress. That's what I miss and what I'd like to have back. But I can't shake the feeling that she's quietly phasing me out. She doesn't want to fully detach, but she also doesn't want to actually show up.

In a few days I'm heading to her city — I have a place there, which is where we normally meet. I'm thinking about asking her directly what she actually wants. I'm done waiting around for her to be available on her own terms. I need a clear yes or no so I can move on either way.

Should I meet her face to face and confront her? Or should i wait for her availability.