Maybe it was all fake

It’s been a month since my bf of a year ghosted me with no explanation and posted I’m a whore who disgusts him. He was then with girls two days later as I was begging and pleading and sobbing. Some days I still feel really sad, and sometimes I’m just so angry. I’ve reflected on ways I could have been a better gf, but even so, I did not deserve to be abandoned and humiliated.

But what really upsets me the most is how coldly and easily he just cut me off. Not one word. Nothing. That’s how little I meant to him. How the hell was that so easy for him? Sometimes I feel like everything was fake just because of how he acted at the end. I know I shouldn’t miss someone who did all of that to me, but for some reason I blame myself a lot bc clearly something set him off about me. Or maybe it was projection. I don’t know but it’s been a humbling lesson for me. Don’t ever think someone won’t do you like that, bc they can and will.