Tired of the consequences of my sin

I know God doesn't owe me anything. Not too long ago I felt like the worst sinner in the world. Before I repented and believed, I was a blasphemer, and I did hinduism meditations and idolatry. Things got supernatural and scary. I spent like, months crying feeling like the worst sinner and apologizing to God. I have in in Christ's sacrfice for the removing/forgiveness of my sins and his resurrection for my justification. However im still dealing with the consequences like nightmares and sometimes some sleep paralysis. Last night I "woke up" with sleep paralysis and I tried saying Jesus' name until I regained some control of my jaw. I dont know if you ever had sleep paralysis before it feels like theres a litteral demon there. This never happened before I dabbled in hinduism stuff for 9 months a year ago now. The Bible says we are given the Holy Spirit when we come to believe, so I dont understand why I still get nightmares and associated sleep problems still.

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Like I said, I felt like the worst sinner in the world for this, not so much anymore (There's no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus Romans 8:1, and nothing can separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus, Romans 8:38-39) but Ive been comparing myself to others this past week (I know this right either) but its like, why is that guy living a happier life than me? Unrepentant murderers, people who are actively in witchcraft, ect ect.

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Idk, I guess im asking for prayers for better sleep. I want sometime to say its going to be okay, or, 'I understand' but when I talk to people about this they basically say you're feelings are wrong and stop feeling what you feel