HS reunion being organized by my rapist

TW: SA

Ran into a couple of people from high school last night. They mentioned the 10y reunion is coming up and encouraged me to come before mentioning that it’s being organized by someone I used to be really close with, aaaaaand also by my rapist.

I didn’t really say anything in the moment. Was able to turn my brain off for the drive home until I suffered breakdown/flashbacks until I finally fell asleep.

The last thing I remember before I was able to fall asleep was envisioning showing up to the reunion, maybe halfway through, saying hi to a couple of people I appreciated and haven’t kept in touch with, and then walking up to him and decking him square in the orbital. Making him have to suffer even one reminiscent ounce of what he has put me through and what he deserves in return.

His mother is a lawyer. Gasp, I know.
I was already suffering emotional abuse / witnessing physical abuse at home at the time of the assault, so was not in a position with the support I’d have needed to be able to hold him accountable for his disgusting actions back then.

Now I’m stronger and more supported and am finding some satisfaction in pondering whether he’d put mommy to work if it meant he had to explain the reason a woman he hasn’t seen in ten years walked straight up to him and punched him…

I know it should just be a daydream, but I have honestly yearned for an opportunity for this for over a decade now. And it being in front of everyone contextually relevant at the time would be better than I’ve ever imagined. When picturing the consequences, I feel a sense of ambivalence abt it (and that’s on white privilege).

Alternative suggestions? If I’m not going to publicly raise any hell on him to any degree I doubt I’ll end up going.

Edit: thank you all for the camaraderie and empathy. and reality.
I’ve spent enough of my young life cleaning up that mess, I don’t need to start that process all over again, much less publicly and legally. BFFR, the victim rarely ends up better off than when they started, anyway.
I’ll savor the fantasy while it feels useful, but I probably also need to woman up and finally do emdr about it. ❤️‍🩹