my life is embarrassing

i keep failing socially at work. recently we had a lunch party where i didn’t say a single word to my co workers and was being extremely awkward, and im pretty sure they don’t like me.

at my other job im facing the same issue where im so weird around my co workers and get anxious around them and can’t talk to them.

also i feel really stupid at my job where i keep making mistakes and being slow compared to everyone else.

i just keep replaying these scenes and have so much anxiety about going back to work because i ruined my reputation and i embarrassed myself really badly . i’ve been dealing with these type of problems basically my entire life and idk if it’ll get better.