Hello I just wanted to know if I can stop identifying myself as transmasc (this will be a bit long to explain sorry)

Hello Im writing this because this situation is scarying me a bit ,I dont know if this is the right corner of reddit to write these things (if you know any other community you can tell me !!)....so as you read I dont want to identify as trans any longer ...or at least I do not care anymore because I actually (for me ) hate labels and Idk I feel a lot of anxiety every time I think about this ...you may think its normal to be scared or anxious but in 1,5 years I have told (to the same people) that I wanted to be called *another name* and with he/him pronouns (or simply coming out)....then the anxiety didnt calm even a bit so I regretted all these decisions and later I told these people I was still confused/lost/too anxious and I didnt wanted to be trans and then I repeat it all. I feel tired I dont have a lot of desire being a boy or a masculine identity but somehow I feel the urge to return to that ....I do things that feels no longer "normal" or "healthy" and I put before my interests my "ipotetical" gender identity,example : I cant let my hair grow and I have to cut them very short at some point not because I like the short haircut but because "what if you are a boy and you are living in a lie" --> this is one of the thoughts that give me anxiety .Again pls dont misunderstood this with "Im in denial or Im too scared to open myself" its more like "I have no desire to be trans/to transition but I have urges,fears and intrusive thoughts about it"

As I asked in the title am I a bad person to like "changing my mind" on my identity ? I just wanted to know by trans people :') (I still support lgbtqa+ community also Im bi so Im kinda still part of it lol)