Has anyone ever noticed how bad someone is being treated and you think they need kindness to feel better, but it backfires?

I have seen people who I thought were going through hard times or would tell me they were being treated horribly by people. I would think that me showing kindness to them would help them feel better, but I've noticed that they treat me worse....the person that genuinely cares for them. It's like they respect people who treat them horribly. But I feel like I was naive with thinking treating them with kindness would make them feel better. My problem is I don't know how to change that. I don't want to be horrible to people, but I also don't want to keep believing that kindness saves or will change people.