Miss her dearly

That’s all. I know I miss a version of her that barely existed. She was still my wife and favorite person in the world to spend time with. I don’t recognize her anymore, it’s all gotten so twisted.

Her choosing other men over me hurts, but it hurts more to watch her self sabotage and self destruct. I truly believe I was her best chance at happiness and stability, and I believe she wants that. But doesn’t know how to brave the quiet calmness of stability. So she picks and pokes and accuses and then jumps when you crack.