feeling really confused and need some advice on what i should do?

kinda long sorry.

My bf (M26) and me (F23) have been together for over 5 years. We were long distance for the first 4 and after he graduated and got a job he got an apartment and i moved from my home state to his, 1000 miles from my family. I have no one here but him. I have a few work friends.

The problem is, ever since I moved in we have both been unhappy. Here is why I am unhappy.

- He’s not an affectionate person. Even being together this long, he still doesn’t hug me or acts stiff when i hug him and doesn’t wrap his arms around me. He doesn’t kiss me, I kiss him. He only really makes out with me when we have sex. i don’t get aftercare btw. He rarely compliments me (He used to all the time) Example: I sent him a pic while he was at work of me in a new bikini asking what he thought and his reply was “Nice” I’ve had so many talks with him about this and he just doesn’t change or make an attempt to change it.

- He constantly “jokes” with me about things i’m insecure about. He says it’s a joke, but then when i get upset he’s like “you’re always complaining. You’re always mad” Example: I wore a new pair of jorts (which i’ve never worn those before) and he said i looked like a little boy. He makes “jokes” like this a lot. I’ve talked to him about this too and he doesn’t change

- He’ll come home from work and not say Hey or ask how my day is or anything. Doesn’t kiss me. When he leaves for work he gives me a handshake. no hug no kiss. like… wtf?

- He works with this girl and i found messages on his slack (work messages) of this girl blatantly flirting with him. i’m a girl and i know how they flirt. He denied she was flirting. He didn’t flirt back but he still is around her all the time since she’s in their friend group at work. They’re constantly out doing things and yeah it makes me jealous. Never met these people.

I kind of feel trapped in a way. I love him and he loves me. We’ve agreed to work on things but our last talk we had we almost broke up. We both said we were unhappy and i’ve lived here 6 months. I want to stay in this state but at the same time i don’t make enough to afford an apartment for myself. I would have to move back home. Then i’d feel like a disappointment and a failure.
I will say yes i am insecure. Yes i am not in the best headspace. I am a very jealous person. But i’ve done everything with him. He’s the first person i’ve been in love with, had sex with, everything. I imagined my future with him but now i’m not sure. I can’t be this miserable forever. But it’s so hard to let go.

On his side, he brought up reasons he’s unhappy with me.

-I am not good at saving money or following a budget. I pay bills but i send him the money when i have it, not the day it’s due because i usually don’t have it until my check comes. I work at Walmart and i don’t make a lot. He makes way more. He’s salary. But he pays for his car and the rent. my job is utilities and groceries. I have my phone and car insurance to pay as well.

I understand why he would be upset about that. I do agree i am not good at money and i need to be responsible with it.

- I am always mad or complain too much. I do this, because of his actions and i’ve told him this. I have told him i need the affection. I need his communication. i need reassurance. I get mad when he doesn’t want to touch me or kiss me. My heart just hurts.

The girl is constantly in my head. Anytime he’s out with friends i know she’s there. It hurts my heart that he’s out with her and i’m at home alone. He doesn’t give me the affection i need.

Please don’t leave hateful or rude comments. Be blunt and honest. But still be nice because i’m sensitive lol.