My cat just came from the vet

He has cancer that might have started in his spleen. Is now a big mass in his stomach and might have metastasized to his lungs.

The vet doesn’t know when it started so she can’t tell how long he has. It can be days, it can be weeks.

Last time he was at the vet for his wellness exam and senior blood work, was 1 year ago. The vet at the time didn’t feel any mass and his blood work was fine .

I have so much guilt for not noticing his deteriorating sooner.
We had a baby 2 years ago so I didn’t spend time with him as much.

He was always a picky cat and i had to buy his wet food weekly because he would like something for a few days and then he wouldn’t.

So it took me a bit to realize he wasn’t eating his dry food anymore and he was just asking for wet food which I immediately increased to 2-3 cans a day.

He stopped sleeping in bed a few months ago, maybe longer but I didn’t pay any mind to that until recently.

He stopped grooming himself ☹️ and I could see he would be wobbly at times and that’s when I decided something wasn’t right and I made a vet appointment.

In my defense I tried a few months ago but my husband talked me out of it saying “there’s nothing wrong with him, he is just getting old”

I cannot deal with this. This was my first pet. He was with us through 3 moves. Lived with us in a hotel when we were waiting to close on our house.

He was there 10 years ago when I decided to stay, for him.
He slept on my pillow for the past 15 years.

He is 15 years old.