Advice needed

To give context before I tell this story Friend A & B are best-friends, in theory I’m close to both. I also really don’t know my purpose of this post.

Basically after graduating in 2024, Friend B’s little sister calls me asking where Friend A’s location is, I tell her, “she’s at home, why?” She starts crying and explaining to me that she caught her sister at in n out with friend A BF hanging out by themselves, she lied and told her parents that Friend A and BF were all hanging out together. To give more context, Friend B has always been a bit messy, always flirting with other people even though she’s been with the same guy since 6th grade, and she’s manipulative, she’s the type to be like “we’re just friends blah blah blah”. So I found this out in June/July. I pretend like everything is normal, all I really do is cry (so pathetic I know). Early August Friend A and her BF break up even though they hadn’t seen each other since maybe June/July due to him being distant with her. During this time I’m Friend A number #1 supporter, I was always there for her when she was crying to me which makes it so much worse on why I didn’t tell her. What is even worse is that I hear friend B trying to console her over the phone AND I still don’t say anything. I asked my mom and cousin what to do, both gave me different advice. Fast forward to February, Friend B’s little sister gets upset with her because she finds out that Friend B is messing with this dude in college when she had just broken up with her boyfriend the week before, she’s on call with friend A and she eventually tells her that she saw her sister and friend A BF at in n out, and were snapping (wtv it’s called). Friend A calls me and asks me if I knew , I said yes, I explain the situation and obviously she felt hurt by me. I text friend B, “hey sorry to drop this on you but I don’t really want to be friends anymore, I hope everything in life works out for you”. Even worse that I waited so long to stop being friends with her when she was never an “amazing” friend to me, constantly leaving me out/shit-talking and I knew how bad of friend she was, and all my friends hated that I was friends with her. Friend A and I find out throughout the months that it wasn’t just a flirting thing l, they had sex that day of in n out and he flew out to her college and “allegedly” film a sex tape. Eventually friend B bf finds out and he calls me asking me a lot of questions, I answer all of them and even tell him personal details about friend B which I probably shouldn’t have done In retrospect, a part of me knows that he needed to know all the info and another part of me feels as tho what I told him didn’t have much to do with the situation and was invasive considering I had been her friends for many years.

Fast-forward it’s been 2 years friend A has forgiven me/or atleast tolerates me which I don’t even understand how someone could be gracious enough to do after what I had done to her. I’m having a really hard time letting go of this situation in my head, part of me thinks it’s a victim mentality on my part, very much “woe is me, I’m such a bad person blah blah blah”, another part of me thinks that I’ve been a people pleaser all my life ~clearly~ and it played heavily into this situation. I don’t want to be this type of person. My people pleasing tendencies even got me my senior superlative, “most likely to brighten up your day” crazy part is in some way most of the time when I help people I do it out of obligation which is another thing that I hate about myself, and I’ve been slowly unlearning this for the better part of 2 years. I hate that I’m letting this situation affect me so much because my high school experience was all I ever wished for, for many years I grew up lonely and by myself so when my family finally settled down when I was in the 6th grade , the friends I made became a very deep part of me , my class was only 100 people and I can still recite all their names. I feel so guilty for what I’ve done I can’t even look at videos from high school because I’ll jsut start getting anxious. It just baffles me that I could hurt someone in this way. I guess I’m just asking for advice , things I can do to ease the guilt and actually become a better person rather than just feeling guilt because quite frankly it’s pathetic.

(I had a lot more to ask/say but now I’m blanking)