13/06/2026

Hi...again. I'm trying to keep my promise to not contact you again...but how can I? How can I when I yearn for us to get back together? How can I when I miss you so much it pains me to go on Instagram and not see a message from you? How can I keep no contact when I sit in my room crying, in my favourite spot on the floor by my wardrobe, and remember our video calls like it was yesterday? How can I get over you, when you made me fall deeply in love with you and then didn't give me another chance? How can I get over you, when all I do is cry and regret lies that I made up to protect myself? How can I forget you, when we talked about a future, kids, joining our lives together? How can I forget you when you were the one who brought joy into my days, made them feel alive? How, just how?

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I wish I was strong enough to tell you this right now, I wish I was mean enough to break no contact and constantly remind you of me...but I'm not. I fell in love with you and now I hurt. I hurt so awfully that I try to keep myself occupied with everything, but the hurt still seeps through. It still hurts. Everyday without a "good morning" from you pains me more. I wish you would tell me that we should give it another try, so I wouldn't have to keep yearning for you and waiting for a message that I'll never receive. I wish I had more to occupy my time so I wouldn't keep thinking about you. I wish, I wish, I wish, you would take me back...

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"You're not going anywhere", I didn't go anywhere, but you left me...

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You wrote notes about me every single day, I hope you haven't deleted them like you deleted me from your life. Because I want to see them.