I miss him

if I dont text first, we dont text at all

so my bf hasn't texted all day bc we had kind of a crash out yesterday that we talk all day and im distracting him too much. I just wanna rant bc its long distance (not too long but he doesnt wanna meet irl bc hes scared of people seeing us together) and I miss him but for the sake of my self respect I dont wanna text him first. he was really annoyed yesterday that I always keep pestering him to call me when hes home alone for a few hours (bc thats the only time of the day when we can talk freely; we've talked like 1h this week). he says he doesnt even have anything to say to me. I dont know what to do and ive been crying all day bc I got no single text. he usually says good morning right after waking up but I didnt even get that today. I know I could just text him myself but I wanna see how long he goes before he starts missing me. am I that miserable as a person? should I officially consider this as a breakup? but I wanted to marry him. we've been friends for 3 years and officially dating for 7 months. im also tired of him blaming me for not succeeding. im on the phone more than he is, and im doing just fine. its 6 pm now and ive seen him online all day. I feel like im turning into a crazy girlfriend when I started out as "wifey" since we were just friends.

my whole mood depends on him and thats why today ive been crying a lot. I even cried in a public gathering today. how do I stop being this addicted to him and let him dictate my life and mood?