I (32F) think it’s time to breakup with my bf (32M)

We started dating around 2017. A mutual friend set us up on a blind date. I wasn’t attracted to him but thought he was really funny. At the time I had stopped partying. Didn’t have the best childhood. My mom was extremely controlling and I walked on eggshells everyday. After dating guys that were just players and I had low self esteem, my now 32M bf was a nice guy and nerdy. Not what I would typically go for. I thought I should pick the nice guy. And I did.

When I moved to another state with him I brought my dog that was 2yo at the time. He gave my dog 1 month to stop the whining that annoyed him. I was balling my eyes out as I love this dog and was torn on what to do. My mom said not to worry that my family will take great care of him. I cried for months. Looking back, that felt like a test as to much much I’ll give up of myself to my bf.

He’s a gamer and a homebody. Loves food and if we’re on vacation it’s just eat and go back to the hotel room… I was passive and complacent for the first few years. I would brush off things. My friends would tell me I’m the opposite and love to be out and socialize. Which is true. He is point A to point B. I’m more spontaneous. We have different sexual likes but still cater to each other, which feels unnatural and forced and just not fun. It’s not passionate. He has a foot fetish and I love sex and making out. I surpressed these thoughts for years.

Now that we’re getting older I need to be real with myself. We also opened two brick and mortar businesses that he owns and I manage. He always calls me an owner (which I’m not) and I’ve expressed multiple times to stop that because it only feels like a mockery as I have given the place so much time, care, energy, and tears because it’s so stressful sometimes. It’s like I lost my identity when we opened the businesses. He’s my boss. I also asked to not bring up work in bed and he does. I can never get away from it. Even at home.

I’m at point where I want a partner that is a part of my life and not just a partner at home. I do most of the cleaning 99% and walking our two dogs. My first dog is still living with my parents.

He’s not interested in spending time with my family and friends or doing things I like. Unless I agree we will leave the event by a certain time and that’s IF it sounds appealing to him. But I’m expected to go to his family events. I’m just burnt out and have to accept this is who he always was. I’m just more mature now and need to speak up for myself more. Which I have been lately and that’s only led to big arguments.

I have some savings but no job of my own as I work for his business. I would need a new job lined up before I can do anything. I’m so mad at myself for putting myself in this position relying on him so much. I have family to stay with but I’m definitely taking one of the two dogs we own together. He favors the other WAY more and that would keep me up at night.

Anyone ever in a similar situation or have thoughts?