Advice?

As imperfect as I am, one thing you cannot doubt about me is my feelings towards you. How much I admire you, how much I aspire to be you. How I adore you so, how infatuated I am at the way you look at me. How obsessed I am with you, how you look through my lens, it's almost as if it was from a dream—a soft dream;

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the type of dream where it feels like you're floating through a river,

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or flying through soft cumulus clouds,

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or lying in a green, calm grass plain.

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At the end of that dream, there awaits you—and there you lie.

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Happy birthday, my apricity—the warmth of the sun in winter.

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I feel like some issues i have with it is the sudden drop of the word apricity and its meaning, I don't know if it's an actual problem or just me overthinking it. I'm still a beginner, this is probably my best and favorite letter that I've written and would love some advice on it.