[TW: misogyny, orientation play] I met him in person

He messaged me after a recent post and I realized we live close. I’m not sure why I agreed to meet him. We initially just met for coffee and I thought about texting him a dozen times on the drive over to call the whole thing off. When I got to the coffee shop I saw a tall big man, bald with grey in his beard and 17 years older than me. Someone who would have no problem holding me down and someone that I would be mortified to be seen out with. I had told him beforehand that I didn’t want him to pay for anything. When I go on dates with women we usually split the bill or trade off paying. He didn’t even really give me a chance just ordered for me and paid before I could decide to speak up. And then as soon as we say back down he was rubbing it in that I was all talk and how quickly I folded. Our talk was pretty normal and about innocuous things but I got nervous and ended it quickly. He tried to convince me to comer over and watch a show but I said no. As we walked out into the parking lot he grabbed one of my braids and gave it a little tug making me jump.

When he did convince me to go to his place he almost immediately stuck his fingers down my throat and talked to me while I just stood there gagging on his fingers. He bent me over his kitchen island and spanked me. He pulled out my tits and slapped them until they started to redden and bruise. And I just stood there and did everything he asked.

He took me to his bathroom and made me look at myself in his mirror while he wrapped his arms around my neck and showed me how to choke me. Bent me over the counter and spanked me until I begged him to stop. I was looking at myself directly in the mirror the whole time. Watching my face flush and my eyes water as he hit me.

The final part of my humiliation was him fucking my face. I can’t pretend I didn’t know what I was getting into because the night beforehand he had texted me to tell me he was going to jerk off with my face the next day. He pushed me down on my knees and told me to get him hard. I knew what he meant but I was nervous and didn’t want to take him in my mouth so I started to stroke him with my hand. He called me stupid and told me to use my mouth. This was only the third time in my life I’d given head so it didn’t take him long to get impatient and take over. So I found myself kneeling and choking on the cock of a man far older than me while he degraded me. He told me fuck your feminism and called me a fake feminist and a lesbian. I’ve never felt like such a whore in my life.

On my way out he didn’t wait to remind me that I’d chosen to come over and to suck him. He called me fuckmeat and slapped my ass as I left his house. After an hour of dwelling on what I’d just done I messaged him and told him I think I’d made a mistake and that I couldn’t see him again. It didn’t take me long to fold… I know I’m still a lesbian and a feminist. Even if I’ve gone back since I’ve been firm on not letting him fuck me