Best Friend Fall Out

I don’t usually run to Reddit for things, but it’s been really hard for me lately…. this might be a bit long and hopefully she never see‘s this lol but here’s what happened

So let’s take this back a bit. I had this best friend who was like a soul sister to me, felt like she was the only friend that ever truly understood me and vice verse. So last year she started a trade school which I encouraged her to do. I live in one state and she lives in the state next to me (but we’ve been friends since HS, we met in the same state, we are both in our early 30’s now) but we would see each other when possible since living in different states. Anyway I noticed at the end of her time at this school, things felt different/off and I felt like we were drifting apart. She had been making new friends at this school, she was leaving her husband of being together for like over 10 years, getting a NEW bf right away. I just felt a drift… but I wanna say our friendship wasn’t perfect either. I feel like there was a secret competition at times and I can admit I would let my own insecurities get in the way of celebrating her wins super expressively.. and I feel awful about it…. she wasn’t a saint either because I peeped some things she would do too.. But idk, I feel like me being like that really hit the nail on the head after going through all her changes (not that she shouldn’t)…. but we went through like a whole spiritual awakening together, we told each other things other people don’t know, I thought we’d be sisters till we grew old… I sent her an apology a couple weeks ago and she never replied and I sent her another one recently, a deeper apology pouring my heart and soul out and admitting my wrongs and telling her how much she means to me and how I don’t want to ruin what she’s building for herself either (I’ve never met this new bf) and she just hearted it…. it’s been eating me up for a while now. I would cry everyday for like a week straight at a point and I still do sometimes.

Does she hate me, does she never want to talk to me again? I thought I at least deserved a “I don’t want to be friends anymore”. it’s almost making me upset that she’s not even giving me THAT after putting my ego and pride aside over what I texted her…. should I move on? should I send her another text asking her if she even wants to be friends? I‘m so stuck and I need to move on from this feeling because it’s taking way too much of my energy ughhhh