Pesto whole grain toast with egg yolk topped with sriracha and dried prunes!

Long story short I developed feelings for this guy at school as we basically met up every single day for an event prep.  
We found out we have a mutual friend who lives in my neighbourhood and they have both told me they were close friends (u can alr tell where this is heading).  
I kept giving my crush hints that I was interested in him throughout the event prep period and I got signals back which my friends also agreed on.  
Then one day I went to my mutual house to rant to her abt what to do bc I wasn’t 100% sure if he liked me back so I didn’t know what to do like do I make the first move? and she gave me straightforward responses like “oh he does that to everyone”. That’s when I thought oh this is going nowhere so I convinced myself to see him as just a close friend😞  
Then like a week after that thought/ yesterday my mutual friend messages me saying she has smth rlly big to tell me the next morning - and yes I was honestly expecting good news relating to him and me (so embarrassing!!!)  
anyways so this morning I hear it and she straight up drops the bomb that they are dating. Yea I was so shocked and still am rn. Honestly I can’t say I’m happy for them cus I feel way too betrayed…but I can’t get mad at them either cus they’re both super sweet especially my close friend kept apologising to me while telling me the lore. She told me that on the day we met up and I ranted to her she was originally gonna tell me that they’re dating but after hearing stuff from me abt how much I like him she just couldn’t say it to my face😞😞  
idk I genuinely don’t know how to feel and everything feels to raw especially knowing that they had something before and I misunderstood his kindness/ personality as signals😞 what a depressing day

I’m sorry if this is hard to read my first ever reddit post and I type like jm flipping messaging someone😭

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