Fulfilling travel dreams, hurt knee

Folks, this is a major vent for me, lol. I quit my job in January and am using retirement money (I'm a SINK person) to travel in Asia, something I've always wanted to do. About a month ago I tweaked my knee while at a national park and just kind of figured it would get better. But it hasn't and it finally got so bad that I had to go to the doctor.

I am really beating myself up over waiting so long. The doctor said it's probably severe cartilage damage coupled with severe tendinitis. I had an MRI and will get the results and a follow up with the doctor in the next few days.

I feel like I just started this trip, I've only been traveling for about 3 months now. And here I am facing the prospect of a very serious knee injury that will completely alter my vision of my trip. I planned to travel for a whole year!

I know a lot depends on the results of the MRI and the doctor's thoughts and all that, but it's clear to me based on the difficulty I have walking at this point, that I walked on it far too long and should have gone to the doctor a long time ago. I "powered through it," thinking that it would resolve itself and of course that's absolutely the wrong thing to do in that situation. I am kicking myself so bad for that. I didn't want to miss out on places that I was visiting so I just kept walking and hiking and going up and down stairs and all that. So stupid.

I have a real dark cloud over me now. It sucks so bad to feel like I'm not capable of living up to my vision, which I planned for and worked on very hard for months before I left.

I feel like a failure.