My (M22) gf (F24) regularly keeps up chats with friends who have sexual and/or romantic interest in her. Is trying to keep on trusting her stupid/naive?

Hey, me and my gf have been together since 1st of march. It was really intense, definetly lovebombing as she would idealize me to heaven and speaking on being meant for each orher and so on. I recognized that this was a bit much, but i trusted her that she is genuine and just really feels that intensively.

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Before adressing the title, here is a bit of backstory.

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We had a rougher patch in the last month, where her issue was not feeling desired enough because we didn't have much sex (i never lacked on showing affection and my love). My issue was that i felt less connected emotionally to her and for that reason didn't want to have sex.

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When i communicated why i feel more disconnected (i am in sick leave because of depression and some things about her behaviour, for example constantly making jokes about my "so called" stupidness or incapibility, also infront of others), she goes crazy and starts to play the victim, she tells me thats just the way she is and if i don't like that, i probably don't love her and all the things i do are just a performance. About me being depressed there is almost never room for me feeling bad in this relstionship, she either gets irritated about me "being like this" or i just mask and only express my problems when we are fighting or it gets emotionally tense (which is bad from me because then sometimes i shift the focus, but i did a better job on controlling and focusing on her problems.

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Anyway during that time she started to get to know a new male friend. Which i was fine with because generally i am not insecure about that and i trusted her. One time she forgot her ring their after meeting with him and i went to pick it up (lives closer to me and also he wasn't there just was in the garden).

There he left flowers for for her, which made me realise he is def into her, but it still didn't worry me because i trusted her. What made me doubt her that she increased her commitment to him while decreasing hers to me. Constant texting with him, even when we spent time together physically, less texting with me and so on.

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So i did sth morally wrong, but i couldn't stop overthinking, so i went through her phone and she often ventes to him about fights we had with her perspective, where he also insulted me and she just went along. he regularly expressed his romantic interest, but she didn't set any boundaries in contrary she for example said when he said "wait until i show my romantic side" she answered "waiting" or when he worried about our relationship and asked that their type of dynamic may disturb that and if they shouldn't chill. She said that she doesn't want to set boundaries and she wants that their dynamic molds into whatever it will be. I also found a picture of him being cuddle up with his head in her lap, which i find also weird considering how long they know each other

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I apologized for invading her privacy, but obviously confronted her (without saying in detail what i saw) and she went full defensive and lied, that she has no interest and that this is nothing and i shouldn't worry, i pointed out that i know she is lying and directly mentioned the passages as proof, but she just kept on lying and shifting things in a way that contradicts with how invested she was. I also made the mistake of that i let her seduce me into having sex and suddenly she didn't have any problems anymore and she was so happy that the sex was good and she is happy that me finding that out led to solving our sex issues...

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i kept on insisting on her telling me the truth.

She never owned up, but after a ton of lies and different excuses, she tried to justify it with how lonely and unwanted she felt without sex despite me still showing up in other ways despite my condition.

Also in that rough patch when she had enough, she regularly got heavily drunk and indirectly forced me to be responsible for her.

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Since then my takeaway is that i belived her that she has no romantic or phyisical interest in the other guy , but she is manipulative and just tells people what they want to hear for her personal gain.

With that distrust i kept on going thorugh her phone and also with other dudes she regularly does that in order to get money from them. One extreme is even someone (lives on the other sode of the globe) said that he misses making ger horny. She sent a one time photo and then he talked disgustingly about making her his sexslave for 1k per month and giving ger also a bunch of gifts for that and she happily kept on the act (?) And spoke about how promising that offer is and so on. Later also that it has been 4 years sonce they have seen and she suggested meeting this summer.

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I feel stupid and naive for letting that she is just manipulative to others and fully honest and loving to me. She doesn't milk me for money but heavily profits from my acts of service and geneal trait of putting problems and needs of others over mine, so i am a perfect target for that.

I really love her and she also dies things exclusiveöy for me, but my head still tells me that i should end things, because of her obvious red flags.

I feel so torn apart about this