We were engaged and now we’re over

Today my (F21) 2 year relationship ended. I was engaged when I woke up to my (M22) now ex - fiancé. And now I’m alone.

I’m so fucking devastated. We’ve broken up so many times I’ve lost count over our relationship. I’m so so drained, it was toxic and we fought so much and yet I miss him. I don’t want it to end and I’m so sad. So so sad.

He ended it this afternoon very suddenly. I had gone to sleep because I was upset and woke up to messages from him asking what I was doing and why I was ignoring him. I told him I was sleeping and I was very upset - I had just went for an interview and got told upon arriving there was nobody to do my interview.

He suddenly started accusing me of being with someone. Spamming me with calls and FaceTiming me. When I finally answered he couldn’t see anything because my room was completely dark as I was still in bed. I told him there’s nobody here, what are you on about? That type of thing.

He told me that’s bullshit and I need to get up and turn the light on and show him my whole room. He was so convinced I was with someone. Even though he has my location constantly and I live with my family. My mother had been downstairs all afternoon.

I was so taken aback and upset. I had been crying and sleeping all afternoon because of (another) failed interview and his first thought was to accuse me of cheating. I told him no I’m in bed stop being stupid.

He said if I didn’t do it we were done. I hung up thinking he would calm down but he blocked me on everything.

When I called him half an hour later he was on his way over to get his stuff he told me to leave the ring too. I put all of his stuff outside, including my engagement ring. I’m completely destroyed.

As usual he’s tried calling me on no caller ID numerous times tonight, probably to get back together again for the millionth time. And I can’t do it this time.

Being engaged only made everything worse. We fought more. More extreme. Every fight he would tell me to “give him his fucking ring back”.

Some days it felt like he asked me to marry him only so he could punish me by taking it away. And now I’m done.

I feel really lost and I’m heart broken. I can’t handle the sudden accusations anymore. The way he would suddenly snap and tell me we were done so easy. We were planning a life. We bought a dog together. The ring was perfect and I was so in love.

I miss my ring. I miss him. And I know my puppy will miss him too. It’s fucking horrible.

I was going to be a wife. And now I’m alone.