Why is it hard to give up pumping

I’m 6months pp and when I was 3months I was making 4oz on 2 days still slowing decreasing. That all changed because I sleep like a log and have trouble waking up at night and even set my alarm. I also now discovered the pumping bra so I can put my flanges in. I now have the battery pack motif Luna. I also ruined my supply by using silicone inserts and took me a while to figure that out. My breast weren’t emptying when I was using the spectra with inserts and always felt full after a session but when I was using hard flanges they gave me from the hospital using the Ameda Platinum I was making great progress. I’m now making a couple milliliters because of these mistakes. I admit it’s my fault and could have tried harder. I shouldn’t say my fault cuz it’s poor choice of words. My fiance supports me and understanding which I love. We use formula. I’m trying to build up my supply but fixing these changes and went to a lactation consultant. I’m trying but night time pumps are the worse and I’m thinking theres no point anymore but it’s hard to put the pump down during the day. Part of me wants to give up but part of me wants to keep trying but waking up at night seems impossible for me. How do people pump during night and early mornings. I do wake up at 6am but that’s the earliest I can do unless I’m up feeding the baby if I want to feed her during the night to give him a break but that’s not all the time